My One Last Rhapsody

Recently, I've been surrounded with good and happy people which makes it a lot easier to uncarry the burdens. I TOOK THAT first step. And now, it's up to me to stick up with that...

At times, I really wanted to scream and shout to tell everyone that I do not deserve to be treated just like that. I have done nothing wrong. But yes, I preferred to be silent. I stayed calm. Chaos couldn't be taken out by calling out for a war. I somehow realized, there's no need to explain myself. I may please some, but most of them will just believe the unknown. It doesn't matter what has been said, who said it, and to whom it was said... Bottomline is, it hit me so hard! I'm just human! And yes, I really wanted to retaliate, and revenge for that matter. If I did, what does that make me?!

A friend of mine once told me: "We have to be logical at all times." She stressed out a very good point. In all situations, we have to think first before we take appropriate actions. It's being mature! One way or another, if we use our logic then we'll be able to set aside all our emotions and come up with a sound decision.

It took a lot of patience to stay calm. It's in my nature to have a high tolerance for rude people. One day, the truth will come out. For sure, "to you" who's been treating me badly. In time, your own accusations will definitely slap and hit through your own face. Well as for me, I've been awakened... And I have found out the truth that's why I took that first step. It wasn't an easy decision. It took a lot of courage and determination.

I DO NOT BELIEVE IN DESTINY. But, I believe in karmic reaction. If we do good deeds, we'll earn our reward. If we do bad, then we'll pay for it in due time. I have paid my debts, and I learned so much from it.

So now, I'm looking forward for serendipity - "happy accident" or "pleasant surprise"; specifically, the accident of finding something good or useful without looking for it. All of these burdens will be over soon... And when that time comes, it's gonna be worth all the pain.

Butterflies from Heaven

A death in the family leaves a void that cannot be filled. No one can ever take the place of this individual in the world. However, there must be time to mourn the fact that things will never be the same. One minute he was here and now he is gone. The human mind must be allowed to sit with this reality. Mourning is a necessary part of the human experience. If it is ignored, a general feeling of sadness may pervade the whole family.

My eyes filled up with tears as I heard the news

It never occurred to me, how much I could lose 

I find myself wishing that it wasn't real

Every time I think about it, pain is all I can feel

Tears fall from my eyes, I can barely see

But my heart tells me that he'll always be with me

I’m glad he feels no pain now-he lives in a perfect land

I can still feel the soft touch on my shoulder of his loving hand

I lie in bed and cry at night

And I don’t feel any better in the morning light

And I will love and miss him forever

Until the day we are again together.

Together in that perfect place above,

Filled with caring, sharing and love

But until that day comes- I will wipe my tears away.

And hopefully see him again someday

A thousand times we needed you

A thousand times we cried

If love alone could have saved you

you never would have died

A heart of gold stopped beating

two twinkling eyes closed to rest

God broke our hearts to prove he only took the best

never a day goes by that you’re not in my heart and my soul.

We'll miss you MJ! You'll now be with my lil angel... 

Tormenting Feeling

Do you feel guilty about something you did in the past? Do you often think you are a bad person? Do you think you do not deserve to have what you wish? Are you aware of how a feeling of guilt can hurt you and people around you? Do you wish to learn how to let go of this negative feeling that is probably giving you much suffering?

Feeling guilty can be a night mare for some people that have a problem with anxiety or with a similar disorder. It is no wonder that guilt is what keeps a person as a prisoner in anxious state. 

You may wish to get rid of all these thoughts that give you a feeling of guilt but you just simply can't succeed in doing it. This feeling of guilt is coming back to you all the time. Don't try to simply forget about these thoughts that are making you feel guilty, because you will not succeed. You are supposed to accept all thoughts that are giving you pain, and live with them for some time. In time they will perish or won't present a problem for you when you remember about them. 

While feeling guilty can be a cause for you anxiety, it is much more common for guilt to arise when anxiety has already developed. Don't be surprised if you didn't feel guilty till now. When in anxiety state, your feelings can play tricks on you very easily. Your emotions can very easily and quickly respond to every real or assumed guilt that you present in your consciousness, so there is a chance that your thoughts are wondering from one guilt to another, tormenting you and your psyche.

Some sort of Manifestation

Receive "The Promise"

And here is "the verse of hope." After God spent a few verses setting up the background of what the Jews were to do now and how long they would have to do it, He tells them that He has great plans for them.

Simply receive this promise as your own. Yes it was to the Jews thousands of years ago, but these verses set up God's desire for all humanity if they will only do the next step.

I speak of hope... I speak in humility... No time for hatred. All of these burdens will be over soon. 

Breathe.

Inhale.

Exhale.

It's so good to be back!

Okay, so I'm back! 

I just realized that there's no need for me to be quiet despite all malicious accusations. I can't just sit here, and do nothing while you ruin my reputation. I tried to be silent because I'm not used to public squabble. I was raised well, and I wouldn't want to retaliate. Why? Because I'm far better than that... If I did, it's stooping down to your pathetic level.  It's just now that it hit me, jealousy leads to insecurity. I have nothing to do with you, hater! You do not matter to me at all!

So continue hating me! I do not care if you don't like me. The feeling is mutual, I do not care about you at all. Keep sending me rude comments until you get tired of your pathetic acts! 

Enjoy reading!

Waking up from a Nightmare

Have you ever been in a lucid dream, which quickly transforms into a nightmare? Even when you are aware that you are dreaming, sometimes it is at such a low level that you can't manipulate what is happening. Most people have had dreams like this, but if they happen too often, here's how to wake up. 

(Source: Wiki)

Try to realize that you are in fact dreaming. It is much harder to wake up if you think this is all really happening to you. Try to point out things that are happening that cannot possibly happen in real life, or things that just don't feel right. In fact, you can have a lucid dream if this happens, you could even change a nightmare to a good dream this way, try doing things you have always wanted to do, there will be no consequence in your dream. Sometimes even if you realize that you are dreaming it will be hard to wake up, and I do not recommend flapping your arms around to do so, as you'll likely end up in a strange, half-dream state flapping around in bed scaring people.

Attempt to manipulate your nightmare away. Some people are better at this than others, and it's okay if you find it hard. It takes a lot of practice to fully master this skill. Once you have realized you are in a dream, you can change things that are happening, and make the scary events leave the nightmare. This is better than fully waking yourself up if you still want to continue sleeping, or if you liked the dream you were having. Keep thinking of what you want to happen. If you were having a nightmare where you were watching your puppy be killed, keep saying to yourself, "My dog will beat up the killer, and run into my arms". This should happen immediately without repetition if you think it hard enough.

Wake up if you cannot change the dream. If you are having a nightmare where you are in a house that's on fire, and you can't put the fire out, it's time to leave. You should notice that when you yell for help in your dream, it's more of a faint whisper that does not make a sound. This is because your mouth isn't open in real life. You aren't actually activating your vocal chords or using air, so no sound is actually coming out. Think to yourself, 'I'm going to actually call for help'. Some people get the sensation of their brain responding with a no. Continue telling your brain that you will in fact call out for help until the sensation goes away. This is usually the second or third time. Then, say something. You will notice that it seems harder than usual, and that's because you are actually using your vocal chords. This time, a noise should come out, and you should wake up, realizing that it was all a dream.

Try to wake up again. If you still can't wake up, and that fire is coming closer and closer, it's time for Plan B. Have you ever noticed that you don't blink in your dreams? It's simple: try to blink. This is pretty easy, and comes in handy if you are having a really scary nightmare. In the dream, your eyes should close, then when you open them, they will be open in real life. You will probably be awake by then. If it doesn't work the first time, shut your eyes closed, hold them there for a few seconds, then slowly open them.

Try jolting yourself. in your dream, shake yourself so much that it has an effect on you in real life. When you are going to sleep and you have nightmares often, sleep in a position that's easy to 'kick' your legs, in the dream, really kick your legs in the dream which would hopefully wake you up.

The Way of Love

1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned,a but have not love, I gain nothing.

4Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;b 6it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

8Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. 11When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. 12For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.

13So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.