Journal Entry '98: Vulnerable

I have eyes to see the reality

Yet I'm blind to accept it.

I have hands to touch 

and feel the warmth,

Yet I'm paralyse to reach.

I have a mind to contemplate enough,

Yet it's blocked by a stronger force.

I have a heart to know the beating sound,

Yet it's louder than my scream..

I found myself, empty!

I found it meaningless... absurd!

Why you're so mean?

- Sep '98

Journal Entry '98: Spell

Mark this day for you will not be remembered as love.
For you who never paid much attention to all my sufferings,
For you who never cared enough about the sadness you brought me,
For you who never dare to know who really am or what do I feel,
For you who never look deep inside of me..
You are now bound by a curse... a spell!


Mark this day for things will soon reverse...
Until then, I'll just look back at you with an idiot smile...

- Sep '98